We all face challenging times in our lives, whether it’s the sudden loss of someone dear or a prolonged period of feeling stuck.
I’ve been there too, having days when I had to pep-talk myself just to get out of bed.
Here are some suggestions that helped me. If you’re going through a tough patch, I hope these can offer some comfort.
1. Believe That Pain is Temporary: Set a Deadline
It’s easy to feel engulfed by despair during tough times. But remember, every tunnel has an end. Even if you can’t see the light right now, it’s there. Set a mental deadline, be it a month, three, or more. This gives you a sense of control and hope.
2. It’s Okay Not to Be Okay: Consider It a Break
While challenges will eventually pass, they do persist for a while. Don’t rush to feel better. Sometimes, you need to acknowledge your pain, accept it, and give yourself a break. Life is long; consider this period as your ‘summer vacation.’
3. Connect with Nature: Spend Time with Trees
A lot of our pain stems from human interactions. So, step outside, bask in the sun, watch the trees, flowers, and clouds. Nature’s healing touch can be profound. One of my readers once said that during their hardest times, they would sit in a park, observing a tree for hours, drawing strength and inspiration from its seasonal changes.
4. If Possible, Keep Working
While maintaining a work routine during lows can be tough, try not to stop entirely. Working can restore a sense of order in your life and offer a feeling of accomplishment. In my toughest days, I never took a day off. Even if I was just sitting at my desk, being at work provided me stability. I’m forever grateful for that.
5. Note Down the Little Things That Make You Happy
Positive psychology suggests that we’re naturally wired to remember failures more than successes. Our brains tend to focus on negative events rather than the positive moments. This bias can lead to increased stress and reduced life satisfaction.
However, everyday life is full of small joys that often go unnoticed. For instance, witnessing a beautiful sunset on your way home from work or unexpectedly becoming the first in line at a newly opened checkout lane at the supermarket.
Try to spot these little joys in your day and jot them down before bed.
I always keep a list in my phone’s notes titled “Life is so wonderful!”
6. Talk to Someone, But Not Just One Person
During rough patches, it’s easy to get trapped in negative thoughts. Talking to someone can be a great relief. Their advice might also offer a fresh perspective.
Reach out to friends or family members who make you feel safe and supported. After a while, consider sharing with another person; sticking to just one can sometimes feel burdensome.
While some choose to drown their sorrows in alcohol, I’d recommend against it. Instead, maybe prepare some tea and snacks or share a meal. Just chat.
7. Visualize Your Ideal Life in Detail
Take a moment to vividly imagine your “dream life”: What does your perfect day look like? Your dream home, job, or companions? How do you wish to look?
You don’t need to act on these immediately; just daydream a bit.
For example, a friend described their ideal appearance as:
◍ Slim, yet strong body.
◍ Short, colorful hair with a rich texture.
◍ A mix of retro, sexy, playful, and personal style.
◍ Tattoos.
◍ High heels.
◍ Bold and beautiful jewelry.
Imagining your ideal life can instill hope and even inspire motivation – something many need when feeling down.
8. Try Doing Kind Acts for Others
Doing something for others can be surprisingly therapeutic – I’ve found this out firsthand.
You could prepare a gift for your family, leverage your skills to help a friend, or even just thank the delivery person when receiving your order.
The “Handbook of Positive Psychology” mentions: Helping others can divert attention from dwelling on one’s thoughts (like depressive thoughts). Shifting focus from unhealthy thoughts to positive actions can transition someone from feeling vulnerable to feeling empowered.
Even if you feel at your worst, there’s still so much good you can offer to others.
